"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect.”

Motherhood after Infertility and Parenting a child with ASD

Has it been that long?

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Today was my annual gyn appointment. The first step in TTC for baby number two. From the second I pulled into the parking lot anxiety started rushing back to me. Has it really only been 3 years since my HSG? I feel like it was a lifetime ago but then again, just like yesterday.

I was called back and the nurse started going through my chart asking me all sorts of questions and taking my vitals. She asked me if I was still taking a prenatal… nope, but I probably should be since we are going to be trying with the RE soon, should I? Am I still taking my fish oil? Nope… I forgot I was even taking that last time we were TTC. Is E still taking his array of vitamin supplements? No.

Has it been that long that I forgot about it all? Did I block it out? I felt like a naive child going in to ask about TTC for the first time. Not someone who tried for three long years to have a baby. Who tried absolutely everything in the book. How have I not already switched to a prenatal vitamin?! I am just in shock over this… The pain of infertility is felt so frequently even though I have my sweet G but these smaller details seem to have evaded me.

Regardless, the appointment went well. Even though I have lost over 30lbs she still says I need to lose weight (yes, yes I know) but my blood pressure was great which is a total non-scale victory in my eyes. I also got E’s semen analysis order and got that scheduled so we should have the results by our RE appointment.

I really need to get back into the swing of things. Pull out my old binders and start us both on our vitamin supplements again. At this point we will have about 20 days before our RE appointment but I have very little hope in the fact that we would start my first cycle after seeing him anyways without testing. A girl can hope though!!

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