"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect.”

Motherhood after Infertility and Parenting a child with ASD


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So it begins

Today was productive… Got to the RE’s office right at 6:30am and was promptly taken back for my ultrasound. Everything looks great! I am at CD 4 (which I am not happy about… I hate that they don’t do baseline’s on the weekends), lining looks great, no visible cysts, RT ovary has +20 follicles and LT ovary as about 19-20 follicles. I got my lab slip and off I went. 4 vials of blood later I was done with that too and off to the hospital pharmacy to wait for them to open in order to get my meds.

I waited patiently all day. I really did… there was no nervousness or too much anxiety waiting for them to call. When they did they said my E2 and FSH were normal (38 and 6.4 respectively) and I get to start my meds today!!!

My HSG is on Friday and then I go back for a follicle ultrasound check on Tuesday August 2nd with hopefully the IUI being on August 4th or 5th.

Hopefully the HSG will be a wasted test and my tubes are still open and that none of the other blood tests that were drawn today will cancel the cycle. Everything seems to be running just a tad too smoothly, which always makes me a little nervous.


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Financial Game Changer!

The last time we went through IF we didn’t have any insurance coverage and since I haven’t changed my plans drastically (I even “downgraded” a little) I assumed the same was true for this upcoming round. Well… I HAVE COVERAGE! This is HUGE!

4 Forced ovulation
3 IUI
2 IVF (could be 3 if I took advantage of an incentive program they offer)

What changed was my company merged with another company last year and our insurance goes through their headquarters which is in CT. Apparently infertility coverage is required in CT so even though I don’t live there, it’s part of my plan. CRAZY!!!!

I am so on cloud nine about this! Now if only my damn period would start and I would stop spotting (4 damn days now) we could get this show on the road!


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My body is frustrating

Yesterday was the day! RE appointment for baby number 2. It went really well…

We got E’s semen analysis back and his count is a little low (14.5 million when they want to see about 20 million) but his motility and morphology were fairly normal (30% and 1% respectively). Dr. M isn’t too concerned about anything but his sample for the first IUI will help determine if E was having an off day or if we may need to look into something further.

In terms of me, he does want me to have another HSG to make sure my tubes are open (oh joy) and a bunch of other blood tests but the good thing is that we can do both during an active medicated cycle.

The most frustrating thing is my body. I have been spotting since MONDAY! Usually I have a day, maybe 2 of spotting before I fully start but of course when I actually NEED for it to start, it decides to spot indefinitely. My luck will be that I will start tomorrow meaning that I won’t be able to go in for my baseline ultrasound and bloodwork until Monday which would be CD 4. I know they say that CD2-4 is fine but honestly I never had success with starting meds on CD4 the last time we did this.

So I am pissed about that. My body is always screwing things up. There is also a SMALL window for me to start. The absolute LAST day my period could start and us still be able to try for an IUI this cycle is Sunday… and that’s assuming I respond and would be ready for IUI on CD14-16 (and that none of my tests done between CD3 and IUI wouldn’t cause for it to be cancelled). Thank you business trip for adding that additional stipulation on this cycle.

In addition to that I have an awesome summer cold. Stuffy nose, sore throat, gross cough and body aches. YAY!


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One week

One week until our first RE appointment for baby number 2. E is going for his semen analysis today in hopes that we will have the results back by the time of my appointment. So much is swirling through my mind…

  • How are his SA numbers going to look? Will they be as bad as the first time around? Would they be BETTER? It takes about 2 months to see a change in sperm if something is wrong… that wait would be hell if nothing else stands in our way.
  • What will the doctor say about me? What sort of testing am I going to have to go through again?
  • Could I be pregnant naturally? CD 32 will fall on my appointment day and the past 2-3 days I have had so much lower belly fullness, slight crampy feelings and increased urination. Of course once I feel a tiny bit of something I think that there is a possibility and I am sure my mind conjures these real-life symptoms just to fuck with me.

I have said in the past that I am no where near as nervous about TTC this time around just because I know what to expect but now that my appointment is just a week away, the nerves are starting to emerge.