"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect.”

Motherhood after Infertility and Parenting a child with ASD

Can’t this just go smoothly?


8 weeks 5 days – 219 days to go

Last night was scary. Ever since finding out I was pregnant it hasn’t felt real. Even after our viability scan I felt better and relieved but I have kept such a wall up around this pregnancy that I have almost tried to ignore it. This hasn’t been hard since I have had so few pregnancy symptoms and E and I haven’t talked much about it.

All that being said, I still check every single time I use the restroom to see if I am bleeding. I had a few instances of light pink spotting during week 5 but none since. However, yesterday at 4pm I went to the restroom and saw bright red blood. Queue utter panic. I tried to think rationally, drank some water, and rested on the couch. An hour and a half later I went to check and it was still bright red and much more than before. E and I quickly discussed and thought it was best if I went to the ER.

It was a fairly quick process… I got checked in, into a room, 6 vials of blood drawn, and an IV started (just in case) within an hour of arrival. The ER doc came in, got a run down of my history and told me that we would only be able to confirm based on an ultrasound. After about a 30 minute wait I was wheeled into the ultrasound room and was shaking from the nerves. They started with an abdominal ultrasound and all I could do was stare at the ceiling. I knew that the ultrasound tech wasn’t going to be allowed to tell me anything and I was just trying not to cry. I got lucky though… after a minute or so she looked at me and said “promise me you won’t say anything…” all I could do was shake my head yes and she turned the screen to me and said “you’re still pregnant and here is the heartbeat.”

The tears just started flowing. I couldn’t believe it. I was convinced that I’d lost it after seeing that blood. She switched over to a transvaginal ultrasound and took measurements of everything and then I was wheeled back to my room. After a bit of a wait the ER doc came back in to tell me that baby was measuring right on track at 8w4d with a heart rate of 178bpm and there were zero visual signs of why I was bleeding. She told me that since I hadn’t seen any clots and wasn’t have any cramping that it was all a good sign. She had called my RE’s office and the on-call doctor advised that I stop the lovenox and baby asprin as this could be the cause of the bleeding.

So that’s what I’ve done. I didn’t take my lovenox last night and didn’t take my baby asprin this morning which honestly makes me nervous but not as nervous as seeing additional bleeding. Throughout the night the bleeding went from bright red to brown and has been sparse today.

What a roller coaster… Right now I am still pregnant and I am so grateful for that.

5 thoughts on “Can’t this just go smoothly?

  1. That’s scary but i’m really glad that baby is doing ok!

  2. So glad you had such a kind ultrasound tech and that everything is looking okay. I’m sorry it was such a scary experience!

  3. I am so glad this turned out okay. When I read the title I panicked!

  4. I’ve just been catching up! Congratulations on your miracle pregnancy, so amazing! I’m sorry about all the scares. So glad to hear everything is still ok though. I bet you can’t wait to get to the 12 week mark. Hoping the next few weeks will be uneventful!

  5. Pingback: 9 weeks 3 days | "Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect.”

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