"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect.”

Motherhood after Infertility and Parenting a child with ASD

Dear baby boy,


39 weeks 3 days – 4 days to go

Dear L,

As I approach your estimated arrival date I am filled with all sorts of emotions. Knowing I only have a few days left for us to be connected as one fills my mind the most. I am not ready to share you with people. I wish it could be just our family of four for a while before having to hand you off to so many different people. Oh your kicks, I will miss those so much! Even though you are seriously strong and it’s sometimes uncomfortable I absolutely LOVE you moving around in there. Having your dad lay next to me at night and marvel at your movements is pretty special too. Knowing you will be the last baby that we get to have makes me cherish every second of your pregnancy. You truly are our miracle.

I have doubts of being a mom of 2. I worry about the age difference between you and your brother… to be honest, I worry about almost everything. Through it all though, I am so ready for you to be in my arms.

I think about what you’re going to look like (probably just like your brother, who is the spitting image of your father), what kind of baby you’re going to be like, and how I know my love for you is only going to grow every day. The days of it just being me and you are numbered, kid. Soon I will get to learn all these things first hand.

There are just a few things I want you to know… 1) Always be yourself. Don’t think just because your brother or your friends are doing something, you have to do it to. Do what makes YOU happy. Always. 2) Remember that your dad and I will ALWAYS be here for you. I don’t care what you do, we will always stick by your side. 3) Stay strong. The world we live in today can be a harsh place. Know that you have the strength in you to weather any storm that comes your way. 4) Last but not least, know just how much I love you. There aren’t really words to describe the love I have for you but nothing in this world can change it.

I hope to be holding you soon my sweet boy. I love you so much.


2 thoughts on “Dear baby boy,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s