"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect.”

Motherhood after Infertility and Parenting a child with ASD

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9 months old


Three quarters of a year old. Tell me how that is possible? I honestly don’t know where the time has gone and yet it feels like you have been a part of this family since the beginning. The past three months have been an explosion of growth for you. You act like a full-blown toddler already and it’s so incredibly sweet and entertaining to see someone so small acting like such a bigshot.

You started crawling at 6.5 months old. It seemed like you only spent a day or two figuring it out and ever since then you’ve been a little speed demon! Shortly after you learned how to climb up the stairs and your dad and I were so happy that we made the decision to get new baby gates installed just a few weeks earlier. You started pulling up and furniture surfing just a few weeks later and walking behind your little push toy like a champ. A few days ago, you started letting go of whatever you are hanging onto and balancing for a few seconds. I know it’s just a matter of time before you start walking on your own.

Right after you turned 7 months old you started sleeping through the night. That has been glorious! You absolutely love your crib which is so nice even if you don’t snuggle with me as much as I want. Most nights after your bottle and books you will take your paci, burry your head into my chest for all of 3 seconds before physically pushing me away wanting your crib. On the rare occasion that you’ve had a long day where you’re beyond exhausted and you fall asleep on me, my whole world stops. I sit there and breathe you in. Rock you while I embrace every inch of you. Knowing that you are so at peace in my arms and wishing it could be like this forever. I typically sit there much longer than necessary just because I don’t want to let you go. It’s a feeling I will never forget.

You’re doing wonderful in daycare and the teachers absolutely love you there. They always comment on how you’re such a great baby and that you have an appetite like a grown man. You never want to miss out on any of the action so your naps there are disgraceful but I am holding out hope that when you move to older infant room, where they put everyone on a schedule, that will get better.

The love you have for your older brother is magical to watch. He can make you laugh easier than anyone else and you always want to be right next to him. Most of the time he placates you and lets you crawl and climb all over him but there are plenty of times where he plays with you and you LOVE it! You both laugh and smile and it makes my heart want to burst through my chest. Then there is the odd occasion where G gets angry and wants you to leave him alone. Most of the time this is when G is eating… G does not play when it comes to his food and that doesn’t change when you come crawling over trying to dig into his plate or cup of yogurt. You don’t quite understand yet, you just want to do everything he’s doing, but soon enough you’ll learn.

Everything else is going so well with one exception; your ears. You are surely following in your brothers’ footsteps with the ear infections. In the last 5 months you’ve had 4 ear infections; 1 drug resistant and 1 that lasted a month requiring antibiotic injections. You are having tubes placed in just a few days and I can not wait! You have been on antibiotics for the majority of your life and you probably don’t even know what it feels like to hear clearly or not have pain in your ears. I am so ready for you to have relief!

I can’t imagine what the next three months will hold but sit-tight baby boy, they’re sure to be an epic adventure. You have an incredible light inside of you that I know will do great things and I can’t wait to witness it all.

I love you so much.